It could only happen to me.......

Sooooooooo.....

Yesterday, I got up early to workout.  I started with jumping rope in front of my house for five minutes. Then I wanted to go on a 2.5 mile run.  I had just gotten my heart rate monitor back from being repair. My iPhone app finally decided to work with me and pick up the GPS.  So all in all, it started out wonderfully.  I turned on the monitor app, the running app, the book I've been waiting to listen to and set out with a nice trot.

It was wonderful weather: not too hot or sunny.  It was early enough that only those who were exercising or walking dogs were out.  I got to the end of the first road in my normal route.  Today, I decided to be adventurous.  Instead of going right, I set out to the left.  Wow this part of my neighborhood is beautiful.  Every other house has their sprinklers running.  All of the lawns are gorgeously manicured.  It was almost Stepford in it's appearance.

It was at this point that I decided to pick up the pace.  I sped up, checked my heart rate, burn rate and made sure my lungs were not going to fight back.  All is well? Check! Good stuff.  I am running at a steady clip.  I'm going at such a good pace that it felt like a man who was out running with his dog was using me as pacer.  It was at this moment that the Universe decided to play it's cruel cruel joke.

A sidewalk square turned up and bit me!!! It jumped up and caught my left foot while I was in such a glorious stride.  I tried to plant my feet; to get myself back on balance; to even just keep moving forward.  The Universe was having none of it.  I had been moving at such a steady clip that I began running sideways in midair.  I'm sure it looked like something out of a cartoon.  Legs in the air moving in circles while I am parallel to the ground.  As I came down, I put my hands out brace myself.  Remember those freshly watered lawns, I told you about earlier? Well, one hand landed on the concrete while the other hit the lawn.  This made matters worse.  My hand slipped in the wet grass propelling me forward even more similar to a player sliding hands first into home base.  My knee slammed on the concrete and slid right along the grass with the rest of my body.

I know you are laughing right now.  Just wait.  It gets worse.  You have forgotten that I told you that I was being used as a pacer.  After I managed to roll myself over and sit up, I look up into the eyes of a medium sized black labrador retriever.  I promise you, he looked as though it was making sure I didn't break myself.  The dog looked at me with his eyes asking "What are you doing down here? Did you fall on purpose?"  I looked up at his owner who was kind enough NOT to laugh in my face.  He asked if I was ok and proceeded to tell me that his wife took a similar fall just last year.  He made a point of telling me that she hasn't run again since.  Was he advising me that I am better off on the couch? Nah!!

I picked myself up off the ground.  I notice a small hole in my best running pants.  UGH!! Then I notice the lawn that I just slid through.  You could see the imprint of my arm and a long drag similar to a skid mark. Can I just apologize now if the owner is reading this? I did not fall on purpose.  I am so sure he walked out of his home this morning and said what in the name of everything happened here?  

I am not even more determined to finish but the pain in my knee won the fight.  I get home and my son gives me the "What in the world happened to you" look.  I started to explain and mid-sentence he is in tears of laughter.  So much for sympathy from the teenager.  I go to take a shower as half my body is covered in water, grass and dirt.  I get the running pant down just to find the damage to my knee was worse than I imagined.  You know an injury is bad when the teenager makes the sign of the cross at the injury.

While I didn't run yesterday, Universe, I want you to know that I will be back tomorrow.  Just wait.  You may have won the battle yesterday but I shall win the war!!!